Too Late to Handle

Have you ever been in a situation when you thought, "Why the hell didn't I do this earlier"? I bet all of us have. You kept on avoiding doing something saying "I can't do this, what if ..."? and in the rare circumstance that you actually do the thing that you had been avoiding for so long you feel so miserable at having done it so late in the game.

The only way to get over your fears is to chase them away. My dad told me this when I was too young to understand the actual importance of this sentence. It all makes so much sense now. But then all I think now is that it might be too late in the game now? I have been running away from my fears for so long now that I have understood that I would eventually loose this battle, for I am a mere mortal and I cant run forever, but my fear would haunt me as long as I live.

"It was only a fantasy, the wall too high, you cant see...No matter how he tried he could not break free...and the world ate into his brains". Famous lines from a famous song by a very famous band. Such coincidence that this song comes up when I am writing this post. It is such a fitting statement to come up. You have to grab your dreams and make them come true, killing all the if's and but's that come along the way.

I was so scared to talk to this one person all this while that I could not utter a word from my mouth when that person came in front of me. The reason that I was scared was that, this person was so dignified and transparent that I felt really really small (microscopically small) whenever I met that person. All this while I just kept avoiding meeting that person so that I did not have to face that agony anymore, or I made sure I was not in my senses whenever I talked to that person, so that the pain felt a bit less painful.

Then one fine day, I thought what the hell, let's give it a shot, and before I knew I was really good friends with that person and I was really happy at that fact. Then came the realization that "Why the hell did nt I do this earlier" and this just hit me so hard that I came crashing down to the accept the fact what a fool I had been all this while. The icing on the cake to celebrate my misery was the fact that this person was about to leave the town and the country in a few days time. It was getting so much to handle that my life seemed to going on in a fast-forward mode.

There are friendships that last for ages. And then there are those that are flashes in the pan. You cherish the memories of both, for both of them have a special place in your heart. It's tough to forget the nice times you spend with the closest of your friends and it always comes as a shock to you when one of your friends has to leave and you suddenly realize that your life is not going to be the same from now on. I guess that's what life is all about. At the end of it all, you will only be left with the memories, the only thing that will be totally yours and no one else will have any claim on it.

I dream a lot. I dream of going to most wonderful of places in the world, the beaches, the mountains, the smallest of villages and the biggest of cities. I dream of going on long drives, alone in my car, to meet my girl. I dream of amazing impromptu trips with my friends with no planning at all. But the dream that I would like the most to come true is that of meeting a long lost friend in a remote corner of the world where both of us are lonely and we only have each other for company. Until that happens to me I only hope that there exists such a place. I only hope that there is such a friend.