Be Happy Sad, Not Sad Sad

There are times when you are happy. Then there are times when you are sad. This is about the times when you are neither of the two. This is about those times when you dont know how you feel. When things happening around you seem so immaterial. When you are "Comfortably Numb" to the world.

You never know when this happens to you or how this happens to you. Therefore you also dont know how you can avoid it or how you can live with it. Its a terrible terrible feeling and you want to get out of it but you are as helpless as a kitten up a tree, not even knowing your right foot from your left.

Time just seems to stand still. You are clueless about what is going on and you can only hope against hope that this feeling just passes away as quickly as it can. The thing that kills you the most is the sympathy and consoling by those who are close to you. You know deep down inside that they are just trying to help but the truth is that on the inside you just get even more irritated and frustrated, both about the fact that you are behaving this way and also about the fact that it might rub off on those trying to cheer you up.

You want to be left alone when you already are the lonliest person on the face of the earth. You dont feel like talking to anyone and you want to scream like you've never screamed before. There is no cure for this, no instant solution that makes you feel high. Mind you, this is not to say that you cannot get high, only that mind has it's own ways of interpreting things and feelings and materialistic things seem to be the least important of them all at that point of time.

Time can heal the biggest of wounds it is said. It could never have been ever more appropriate than in this regard. Whenever you feel this way, the only thing you can do is to let things be and take them as they come. Time as I already told you will stand still as if making fun of your misery and your desperation. In some ways this is a test of your patience and in other ways of your endurance. If you think about it this way, you can overcome this feeling much easier than trying to push yourself over it (you might end up pushing yourself over the edge).

There are times when you are happy. Then there are times when you are sad. This is about those times when you are neither of the two. Time afterall is meant to pass away, it is not meant to stand still. Yes, contrary to the popular belief, it does changes the rate at which it passes away. Sometimes this is excruciatingly slow, other times its really really quick. Remember the fact that in the end its only you who can change your own mind and no one else. It then hinges totally on you, how you choose to live your own life.

I would like everyone to keep smiling at all times (even at the toughest of times). It makes others think what you are upto....Happy living.

Too Late to Handle

Have you ever been in a situation when you thought, "Why the hell didn't I do this earlier"? I bet all of us have. You kept on avoiding doing something saying "I can't do this, what if ..."? and in the rare circumstance that you actually do the thing that you had been avoiding for so long you feel so miserable at having done it so late in the game.

The only way to get over your fears is to chase them away. My dad told me this when I was too young to understand the actual importance of this sentence. It all makes so much sense now. But then all I think now is that it might be too late in the game now? I have been running away from my fears for so long now that I have understood that I would eventually loose this battle, for I am a mere mortal and I cant run forever, but my fear would haunt me as long as I live.

"It was only a fantasy, the wall too high, you cant see...No matter how he tried he could not break free...and the world ate into his brains". Famous lines from a famous song by a very famous band. Such coincidence that this song comes up when I am writing this post. It is such a fitting statement to come up. You have to grab your dreams and make them come true, killing all the if's and but's that come along the way.

I was so scared to talk to this one person all this while that I could not utter a word from my mouth when that person came in front of me. The reason that I was scared was that, this person was so dignified and transparent that I felt really really small (microscopically small) whenever I met that person. All this while I just kept avoiding meeting that person so that I did not have to face that agony anymore, or I made sure I was not in my senses whenever I talked to that person, so that the pain felt a bit less painful.

Then one fine day, I thought what the hell, let's give it a shot, and before I knew I was really good friends with that person and I was really happy at that fact. Then came the realization that "Why the hell did nt I do this earlier" and this just hit me so hard that I came crashing down to the accept the fact what a fool I had been all this while. The icing on the cake to celebrate my misery was the fact that this person was about to leave the town and the country in a few days time. It was getting so much to handle that my life seemed to going on in a fast-forward mode.

There are friendships that last for ages. And then there are those that are flashes in the pan. You cherish the memories of both, for both of them have a special place in your heart. It's tough to forget the nice times you spend with the closest of your friends and it always comes as a shock to you when one of your friends has to leave and you suddenly realize that your life is not going to be the same from now on. I guess that's what life is all about. At the end of it all, you will only be left with the memories, the only thing that will be totally yours and no one else will have any claim on it.

I dream a lot. I dream of going to most wonderful of places in the world, the beaches, the mountains, the smallest of villages and the biggest of cities. I dream of going on long drives, alone in my car, to meet my girl. I dream of amazing impromptu trips with my friends with no planning at all. But the dream that I would like the most to come true is that of meeting a long lost friend in a remote corner of the world where both of us are lonely and we only have each other for company. Until that happens to me I only hope that there exists such a place. I only hope that there is such a friend.